Well, I haven’t been with my husband in 3 years but have.been intimate during this time. I don’t want to be with him. But, he moved in with a old girlfriend and it hurts! I’m not sure how to feel or get.over this. I have been with him since I was 15 years old. We have been married 25 yrs now. Apart 3 of those. But, my problem is I love him. I haven’t slept with anyone else. But, I did date other people. I found myself still loving him. I wanted us to work. To much water under the bridge. How can I make the hurt go away and the love?
Posts tagged ‘loneliness’
My name is Bella the mini yorkie that lives in the house on the corner. The one with the crazy lady that talks to herself and sings aloud all the time. She runs around in that brightly colored moomoo!
Well, let me tell you she loves and cares for me so good. Even when she has very little to eat she makes sure I have a meal and a treat. She is a giver that one! When she scratches my behind, just above my tale I shake my leg for her and she delights me with a smile and that full belly laugh of hers.
She talks to herself as I said. And, she talks to me. Often she says how much she misses having her family all together again. Her son’s are all grown up with lives of their own. Her grandbaby makes her as happy as I do if not more. If only she could see her more. She talks about maybe getting us a man around the house. I bark at her when she talks non sense! My master is lonely but each day is better for her I can tell.
Often she looks in the mirror and says she looks like a dog!? This I don’t understand I am a dog. I’m beautiful and I know it. I wished I could tell her how pretty she is. I bark when she talks bad about herself. Maybe, just maybe, someday she will see how perfect she is like I ser her. Until then I will be here with her through the ups and downs. Because, to me she is perfect.
Finally, ready to date after 3 years of morning the loss of a 25 year marriage. It’s time right? I’m totally scared of this dating thing. And I don’t do bars nor do I go to church. Both places to meet new people.I moved accross the USA. So, I don’t know many people. Where does a menopausal woman with no clue about dating this day and age start?
Hearing stories that this person met her husband online or another is dating from meeting off an online dating site. So began my journey to online dating.
My good friend warned me about men just looking for sex period. I opened an account on a free site a few weeks ago. Boy, was my friend right! I was bombarded with private messages about my breasts. You see I’m no Barbie. I’m curved and beautiful. This took me forever to see myself that way. Anyway, I had to change my profile bluntly stating I will not send nude pics nor will I kiss or screw on the first date. I said if you are looking for a booty call look elsewhere! Can you believe the messages still continue?
Well, I met one nice guy so I thought! We exchanged numbers and talked many times. I thought we clicked. Out of the blue he calls and said he isn’t looking for anything serious only sex. Wow, he smoothed talked me almost into possibly meeting him. You see he grew impatient! I was busy for a week with my new grandbaby and hadn’t had a chance to answer his messages. I forewarned him I was going to be busy!
I just can’t see any point in online meeting people. Seems to me sex sex sex is all that is wanted! Where is a girl to go to meet someone that can keep it in his pants at least until I say yes!
Any suggestion welcome!
Well, I looked at this writing prompt and thought ewww! I don’t want to write about that. But, that instantly told me this was a subject I needed to tackle. For one simple reason my glass had always been half full. Meaning to me I had a lot going for me in my life and there was always room for more! Now, after raising three sons and a marriage of 25 years ending I feel my glass is so empty and I’m having to drink sparingly because there is nothing to put in it. My life has been full of changes including a 2500 mile move away from a life of torment and pure hell. Now, I just go through the motions of the day. I live in a small country town still thinking should I search for a well to replenish my glass to return it to half full? Or, do I just sit and drink until it empties?