Yesterday happened like every year since we were young. Yesterday was sad like it always is since you have been gone. I am doing good in my life and I know you sending your beautiful brother to me at the exact moment you did lastnight reminds me your still with me. I have pictures of you now. I love them! I sent them to each boy. They knew it was your birthday yesterday too. They each morn the loss of you differently. One of them said yesterday to his wife. My uncle taught me more about being a man than anyone else in my life. I know you heard that and smiled. I’m so glad for the time you spent with my kids. I watch your oldest child and grandbaby grow via pictures online. You are proud I feel it. Now, your brother, how amazing he is raising your baby!? He has invited me to go see them! He is a great man and I now know why you are so close with him. Thank you for placing him in my life. You are just like him! Its funny really. Well, I love you my dear friend! Until the wheels fall off and the creagers crack……..
Posts tagged ‘love’
I haven’t been wanting to write deeply. So, these daily post suggestions suck to me. I am going to approach this prompt differently. You see there have been many times I felt unsafe. Picking one that I can describe so the person reading it can actually feel my fear and uneasiness is a hard one! So, in order for me to get out of my writers block I am going to write a short fiction story on this topic. Yes, I know that’s a cop out I know. But, sometimes a girl needs a break from working on touchy subjects.
It was just getting dark and I was riding my bike as fast as I could to beat the darkness. Plus, being only ten mom wanted me home before dark. Well, my chain resides to come off right as in front of the house me and all my friends know is haunted. Great just great I couldn’t get my chain back on and now it was dark! I started hearing things all around me. I was so afraid of what was coming to get me that I pissed my pants and began to cry as I pushed my bike quickly home. I saw people watching me from every dark corner and I knew this was the end someone was going to kill me. Right before I got home. Just as my house came into view. Something brushed my leg! I screamed bloody murder until I realized it was my darned bike chain. I reached the safety of my yard and through down my bike, tore in my front door and ran to my room. Mom was yelling something but I wanted out of my wet clothes and my tears to dry before I had to face her. I never felt so unsafe one moment and completely safe the next as I did that day.
Ok y’all there is my fictional story on feeling safe. Funny thing is I think every kid has a story of when they first felt unsafe. To bad parents have to tell children don’t be out after dark or this could happen. Don’t talk to strangers or they might do this. We as parents in today’s society have had no choice but to teach our kids to fear. We do it only to keep them safe.
My friend who we will call Amilio is a everyday hard working American. That just so happens to work in a very famous fast food restaurant. He has been employed there for 13 years. I chose him for my interview.
Amilio is a father of six kids and is single. He likes to do nothing in his free time he states. Because he has worked so hard and still lives below the poverty. This plus many other worldly struggles makes him fall into a depression that has been hard to come out of.
I asked him what he liked to do before life grabbed him and our other hard working folks like him to loose their happiness. He liked to play the gitar. He spends a lot of time with his oldest son. Family is important to him and he often feels like he was the black sheep. But, he pushed those feelings aside and cares and lives with his mother. He believes in true love and doesn’t feel he has found it yet.
He hates his job but goes everyday regardless. He in my opinion is a red blooded American that makes our world a better place. I’m honored to be his friend.
Ok, I was in a rut for a month or so. As far as my blog I neglected it. You see, I felt I was giving minimal posts compared to what I truly am capable of. Let me explain. I blog from my smart phone. So, my posts are not very meaty! Then someone said to me that my blog can be just short stories and such. So, unless I go to the local library I will be producing short but sweet posts.
Briefly why I don’t have a computer is because I left my husband of 25 years in June 2012. I was allowed my clothes. No pictures of my kids when they were babies or nothing. Since then I now own my brand new couch, recliner, flat screen, dishes, and bed. Oh, and I live in a house that is mine. I don’t own it I rent but it is mine! I started mind you with a garbage bag of clothes! So, maybe someday I will get a computer but it’s not a priority for now. But, my blog, my means of self expression is.
The other thing I feel I need to put out there in order for you all to understand me is I am a victim of molestation, abuse, mental and physical illnesses, and I am a recovered addict. I tell you all this not for pity just for you to be able to understand some of my posts. All the past trauma I have suffered at my own hands and the hands of others doesn’t make up who I am today. THOSE ISSUES I HAVE DEALT WITH!
Now, me today, wow what a difference! I walk with my head up and a smile on my face. This process of finding myself has been a long one! I am not done by no means. I will never be done. I change every single day. I am going to evolve into the person I know now I am. And let me tell you she is someone you want to connect with in person and through my posts. I look toward to reading all your blogs too! If you chose to follow me I chose to follow you too!
Hello old friend. I decided that it was time I told you how I really feel about you. I hope you can take all I have to say. It is not going to be all bad but I feel it’s time someone called you up on you progress on your process of self improvement. So, put your big girl panties and read on.
First, you know you are still letting your old friends hang around. You know who they are exactly! Their names are self pity, low self esteem, self doubt, loathing, sadness, pain, heartbreak, broken, and misery. Those friends I see hanging around you still. We talked about this and there is no room or time to entertain them in your new life! I guess you need to go back to putting the alarm on at all times so these intruders stay away from you. Use your words Annette to keep them away. Remember the words like, I am worth it, I love myself, I am beautiful, happiness is obtainable, kindness, grateful, breathe, relax, prayer, meditation, are all words those old friends of yours hate.
Now, you have improved a lot! You need to remember how you use to walk with your head down? You cried all the time until you became a catatonic robot. Gosh, those drug induced stupors you lived in almost brought you to death more than once. Not many people walk away from the traumatic things you have. Wow, you are a miracle! That’s why I writing you. The past few weeks have been rough on you. Barely getting out of bed! I’m so afraid of loosing you. Your journey began in June 2012. Celebrate how far you have came my beautiful friend. Continue healing mentally and take better care of your physical self also. I know your pain is real. Don’t accept that you have to remain that way. Yes, your body is facing illnesses that cause you to become depressed and sad. Keep seeing your doctor and try new methods of healing or easing the pain. Get back to eating right too. Remove the word fat from your mind. Speaking of your mind. Will you really try to start each day with prayer, meditation, and positive affirmations. When you were religiously starting your day that way you were happy everyday.
I’m just asking you to look at you and how far you have come and get out of your rut. Your goals and dreams are happening. Always remember where you came from but keep those dear old friends away.
I’m very proud of you and love you with all my heart. Remember that!
It is Halloween again and I am sitting at my blog awaiting my trick or treater’s. My bowl is huge filled with treats like love for the little orphaned child that may stop by. I have some happiness for the broken abused woman that just may knock at my blogs door. You may even know her? Compassion I have a lot of that in my bowl. I know the elderly man that lives alone in blog # 3, the one that served in the war? Haven’t you seen him walking alone? I have a bit of encouragement for that college student that is far from home and is frazzled from work and school.
The truth is me and my blog have so many treats in our bowl you are sure to get the one the tastes perfectly when you bite into it. You shall be full after knocking on my blog’s door this Halloween.
I looked at today’s topic idea and thought it would be easy to choose seven universal words to use that everyone would know and understand. Well, in the state that our world is in there are many I would like to use that all nationalities could understand as well as put them to use! Such as peace! But, that is only a hope of mine as well as many others. Sadly, not enough people get the word peace much less hope for it. However, I’m going to attempt to choose seven words all human beings would comprehend and use for communication.
Ok, yes, peace would be one of them. I dream of a world of peace. Wow, how wonderful life would be! Another word I will choose is happiness. Again, I would want everyone to use it verbally and practice it in their lives. How splendid each day would be if we all felt happiness? Kindness ofcorse is my next choice. If our children were taught more kindness even, topics like bullying and suicide wouldn’t be so prevalent in our society.
So, now I have peace, happiness, and kindness as my three of my seven universal words. How beautiful our world would become if we all started t use these words and put them into action? Oh a girl can dream can’t she?
My other four words are compassion, love, forgiveness, and communication. Add them all and just imagine! Now, I’m depressed and done with this topic!