Life on life's terms

Posts tagged ‘pain’

Shocker

Well, I haven’t been with my husband in 3 years but have.been intimate during this time. I don’t want to be with him.  But, he moved in with a old girlfriend and it hurts! I’m not sure how to feel or get.over this. I have been with him since I was 15 years old. We have been married 25 yrs now. Apart 3 of those. But, my problem is I love him. I haven’t slept with anyone else. But, I did date other people. I found myself still loving him. I wanted us to work. To much water under the bridge. How can I make the hurt go away and the love?

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Me and my blog

Ok, I was in a rut for a month or so. As far as my blog I neglected it. You see, I felt I was giving minimal posts compared to what I truly am capable of. Let me explain. I blog from my smart phone. So, my posts are not very meaty! Then someone said to me that my blog can be just short stories and such. So, unless I go to the local library I will be producing short but sweet posts.

Briefly why I don’t have a computer is because I left my husband of 25 years in June 2012. I was allowed my clothes. No pictures of my kids when they were babies or nothing. Since then I now own my brand new couch, recliner, flat screen, dishes, and bed. Oh, and I live in a house that is mine. I don’t own it I rent but it is mine! I started mind you with a garbage bag of clothes! So, maybe someday I will get a computer but it’s not a priority for now. But, my blog, my means of self expression is.

The other thing I feel I need to put out there in order for you all to understand me is I am a victim of molestation, abuse, mental and physical illnesses, and I am a recovered addict. I tell you all this not for pity just for you to be able to understand some of my posts. All the past trauma I have suffered at my own hands and the hands of others doesn’t make up who I am today.  THOSE ISSUES I HAVE DEALT WITH!

Now, me today, wow what a difference! I walk with my head up and a smile on my face. This process of finding myself has been a long one! I am not done by no means. I will never be done. I change every single day. I am going to evolve into the person I know now I am. And let me tell you she is someone you want to connect with in person and through my posts. I look toward to reading all your blogs too! If you chose to follow me I chose to follow you too!

Happy blogging!

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