If someone told you that you only had exactly 9 minutes to live, what would you do in those 9 minutes?
Posts tagged ‘life’
Man must search for what is right, and let happiness come on its own.
It’s never too late to have a happy childhood.
I sit alone again but now I am not alone. I have a puppy. I named her Penelope and she has bought me a lot of joy. I have had writer’s block aka PTSD, ANEXITY, DEPRESSION, MENOPAUSE. Need I say more? Yes, oh yea I do!
I haven’t been with my husband in 3 years. But, I still love him. I have tried to change it but I still love him. The difference is today I realize that I cannot be with.him and I am not in love with.him. BUT, IT KILLES ME THAT HE IS WITH SOMEONE ELSE! So, I’m dealing with those emotional issues now. That I know if can overcome. But, it still hurts.
Don’t you think about what is your purpose in life? Why am I here? I have been pondering this a lot in my new life. I have wasted many useful years that I can take back or make up for. So, instead of dwelling on what I haven’t done I am trying to think of ways to make a difference. I had this idea to give back to charities that have helped me. My first attempt at doing this flopped and it discouraged me!
I decided to go to a local food pantry to volunteer my time. Mind you I have only gotten help from this one three times! I only went for help when desperate! And many people go to every food pantry every month. Basically using them as they were not intended. I was never one of these types of people. Not that they are bad. But, there are people who abuse charitable giving.
Well, I was so excited to give back and was promptly told no. Because I had gotten help in the past it was a conflict of interest for me to help there. I was saddened. I don’t understand their policy nor have I ever heard of any charity turning down help!
So, my search continues for the right place for me to give back. Until then I shall continue doing little random acts of kindness as I ponder the question what is my purpose in life.
Ok, I was in a rut for a month or so. As far as my blog I neglected it. You see, I felt I was giving minimal posts compared to what I truly am capable of. Let me explain. I blog from my smart phone. So, my posts are not very meaty! Then someone said to me that my blog can be just short stories and such. So, unless I go to the local library I will be producing short but sweet posts.
Briefly why I don’t have a computer is because I left my husband of 25 years in June 2012. I was allowed my clothes. No pictures of my kids when they were babies or nothing. Since then I now own my brand new couch, recliner, flat screen, dishes, and bed. Oh, and I live in a house that is mine. I don’t own it I rent but it is mine! I started mind you with a garbage bag of clothes! So, maybe someday I will get a computer but it’s not a priority for now. But, my blog, my means of self expression is.
The other thing I feel I need to put out there in order for you all to understand me is I am a victim of molestation, abuse, mental and physical illnesses, and I am a recovered addict. I tell you all this not for pity just for you to be able to understand some of my posts. All the past trauma I have suffered at my own hands and the hands of others doesn’t make up who I am today. THOSE ISSUES I HAVE DEALT WITH!
Now, me today, wow what a difference! I walk with my head up and a smile on my face. This process of finding myself has been a long one! I am not done by no means. I will never be done. I change every single day. I am going to evolve into the person I know now I am. And let me tell you she is someone you want to connect with in person and through my posts. I look toward to reading all your blogs too! If you chose to follow me I chose to follow you too!
“I am enough!. I am full of sparkle and compassion. I genuinely want to make the world a better place. I love hard. I practice kindness. I’m not afraid of the truth. I am loyal, adventurous, supportive and surprising. I am a woman. I am enough. I make mistakes, but I own them and learn from them. Sometimes I make lots of mistakes” Molly Mahar.